-LiTe-

Tuesday, October 31, 2006

could my life get any worst?
LYK DUH!!!!
anugerah kok was just okay i guess. puan chang seemed happy with de taerobic. my feet hurt much much more the day i woke. after taerobic sit behind and watch. at least i cut down some boredom time. after that was school leavers service. changed and got ready. miss boey as usualy screaming. everyone was so blur. dunno wat to do. officially the worst school leavers service ever. mc, mich and esther. song leaders, eden flora siew may and melissa. the rest tamborine dance and singing and dancing plus de speaker. pathetic. WORST SCHOOL LEAVERS SERVICE EVER. after that was taekwondo anual meeting and party. had fun here though my feet didnt feel any better. i didnt feel like eating. so din eat. sirs and coaches plus stupid puan chang joined us. =.= im so drained out after that. went to aunty's house. barely had time to sleep. by the time we reached her house its already 4. took my bath at 5 and then at dinner and went to music class. got screamed at like hell. im already fucked up with me being so tired. im sleepy too. and she go and scold summore. cant she be more sensitive. fuck her. i hope she choke and die. i hate this new teacher. i want my old one. tahan so long. dunno wher to cry. i seroisly need to. after that got into a fight with my mum..thats normal. sigh.......today is just not my day...u'll never see me smile again.....

Brok3nD33pDowN

8:18 PM

Can I Turn Back Time?

Monday, October 30, 2006

today was just tiring...i mean..im running here after the stupid performance. go toilet and change... haih... my feet hurt..summore whole cf kena solded by miss boey. has she ever heard of the word ' nobody's perfect' ? she so idiotic sometimes. she wantd us to wear two layers of clothes. helooo... its 30 degrees+ out side. not to mention how hot de hall is with all de cardon dioxide. she has no brains. better safe than sorry. i dun like her screaming at me. i cant stand it wan. i got in trouble wat that time. i got so freaking angry. i slamed my books. helooo news flash i know im nto suppouse to do that but she shouted at me for drawing a line at the side. wtf. whats her problem. im so tired... i jus wan to sleep. but i cant cuz my mum wont let me. life couldnt get worst can it? i can barely sleep. some idiot keep calling me. my mum's gonna take my phone if he dun stop. i have no idea who he is or why he's calling. maybe its my granpa. XD. my feet hurt. my hair's short. ppl ask whether i bcum tb or not...puhleeez i very good girl wan.. even if i did my mum would freak.

9:06 PM

Can I Turn Back Time?

Sunday, October 29, 2006

my wonderful original signature hair is gone!!!! help!!! its ruined!!!!

7:32 PM

Can I Turn Back Time?

my hair is ruined!!!!!

7:06 PM

Can I Turn Back Time?

Saturday, October 28, 2006

heres the daily complaints and dumb things in my life that well, im sick of. tuition was boring the usual yakaty yak nothing to say. bored bored. i cant wait to go back to school.this is BORING......sitting here day after day...

5:47 PM

Can I Turn Back Time?

Friday, October 27, 2006

before anything else happens thats bad in my life... someone come get me!!! one, im so death bored at home im about to rot here. two, my plushie pig is gone!!! three, ive got stupid cf and taerobic to do which is so freakin pathetic. someone save me!!!

12:24 PM

Can I Turn Back Time?

Thursday, October 26, 2006

here's a little part of me thats still a little gurl. i sleep with my fav little plushie pig. i've had it since i was like a baby. this post might sound totally absurb but i dun care! the pig wus always there when my frens turn me down and my family just dont go right. i hug it to sleep and it always kept me company when im alone. its so called my bestie. ^^. im still a kid now!! and i like being a kid!! its better than growning up anyways. well. last night i could ifnd it. usually it would be my sis trying to hid it or something.so i went looking all round the world for it. and could find it. my sis din hid it. then, i saw sumthing in de bin in my mums room. my mum tore my plushie pig apart!my poor pink plushie pig is gone! she distrpyed my pig >.< my fav. little pig. gone!!how could she do this to me? how could she just disorient my stuff like that. i bet next she'll break the guitar. since she's been complianing so much bout my playing to her is noise.i cried myself to sleep yesterday. some might be laughing at me reading this but that pig means alot to me. losing is jus like losing something u could never replace. i din bother to ask. since she found my seni paper tat night. i didnt want to quarrel wit her.i tucked myself to bed early and cried myself to sleep. and i tot my day was getting better when it just got worst. why is it that my life couldnt get better but only could get worst. god!!! whats wrong with u!! why do u keep torturing me like this. why dont u judt take life from me. rite now!!!

5:04 PM

Can I Turn Back Time?

Wednesday, October 25, 2006

the problem with long term holidays is...i get so bored so quickly...its sickening. im so pissed!!!! someone keeps hacking into my flyff account even after i already amde a new one and takes my money! i dunno who and i dunno how. today i din even bother to lvl up. wtf. soon he'll delete my char also. spent so much time doing the dumb quest. so freaking long. besides the fact that my mum is being so much of herself today, nothing happened. bored bored bored

4:49 PM

Can I Turn Back Time?

Monday, October 23, 2006

Sp3cial Story Fr0m M3 H34rt

"i wanted to tell her. i wanted to let her know. i wanted to be more than friends" how i wish i could as i watch us graduate pre school. she's my best friend. she thanked me for being a great friend and left. we met again as faith did its part to give me another chance. to my joy she still remembered me. she never forgotten my smile. we spent every counting moment we had together at high school. but the thruth is i never did get the guts to tell her my long lasting feeling for her. soon it was graduation and itll be over. after graduation she came up to me and thank me for being a great friend.i wanted to tell her. i wanted to let her know. i wanted to be more than friends. i got up the bus as i watch her dissapaer into the black limo. years passed but we still kept in touch. she told me a lot about her new fiance. she even invited me to her wedding. it was a tragic heartbreak but went anyway as a friend. she looked like an angel in her silky white gown with flowers in her hair. she kissed me on the cheek and thank me for being a great friend and for always being there for her. well, all i did was smile. why could i just say it out?? she said those two word ' i do ' meant to me that she was now and foreven not mine anymore. she was someone elses. i wanted to tell her. i wanted to let her know. i wanted ot be more than friends. now, only once in a while we'd keep in touch but still be as close as we were in pre school. one stormy night, i recieved a call from her husband imforming me of the death of my dear and beloved friend.i was speachless, it seems i just let her slip off my hands. i arrived at her funeral the following day. i watch her in her deep slumber. i wanted to tell her, i wanted to let her know. i wanted to be more than friends. i volentered to help her husband clear up her things. while i was picking up her old stuff. a book fell out from the shelves. i flicked the pages. my eys began to water.

how could i have missed thins chance. how could i have let him go. did he not have enough time. i wanted to tell him. i wanted to let him know. i wanted to be more than friends. and now. i could never spend my life with the man i truely love. though....i still wish i could

8:19 PM

Can I Turn Back Time?

once again...i welcome one and all to my dreadful blog where i put down all my pathetic llifes memories to share with all of u. and to make u cherish ur life mmore cuz my life is the worst of them all. all i plan to do this holiday is sulk in fornt of the computer whole day when my mum has to plan all these pathetic and idiotic family fun time...game time..sharing time.. its pathetic. i could have reached lvl 20 if it wasnt for all these time wasteing things. most people know im antisocial. so why am i drawn into a family who is so socialable. everytime we go to someones i house wheters its a party lyk todays ill jus sit by a table ignoring everyone else and anyone who talks to me enjoying my book. one thing i dont lyk bout these kind of functions is there are so many ppl at one place i actually feel like im gonna drown. and then there are idiotic boys plus girly girls whom i dont seem to fit in with. so why try. itll jus end up the same. i dont lyk make up. i dont lyk dresses. i dont lyk play boys. i dont lyk guys who act cool. i dont lyk ppl who force me. face it i dont lyk anything bout my life. life sucks

7:54 PM

Can I Turn Back Time?

Sunday, October 22, 2006

as pathetic as this sounds it normal for me to say i hate boys as much as i hate ppl bugging me about the wrong things.a big shout out a notice today of my own personal pride!!! i ve bought books lots and lots of books to keep me company through out hte holidays. face it i love books!!! after a long patient wait..i finally got A Series Of Unfortunate Events Book 13!!!! I FINALLY GOT IT!!!!! besides the fact that i got the book that i wanted...someone gave me a pig key chain!!! i lurve pigs!!! black and white ones not those pink ones u see crawling in the mud. ^^

5:56 PM

Can I Turn Back Time?

Saturday, October 21, 2006

welcome to my own personal hectic pathetic life of mine. where nothing seems to make perfect sense. my mum is not just murdering me but shes killing me into pieces and im tried of picking it up and sticking myself back together. whats the use when its gonna fall apart soone or later. my frens are angry with each other . ah..what the heck...i dun wanna get involved. my grades are dropping badly. i wonder if my mum would even sign my report book this year. if she doesnt ill sign it on my own. as if the teacher's gonna find out. i downloaded the wrong patch for flyff and now i have to redownload another one. i waited one whole day for it to download and it turns out wrong. and now im back to square one though im already lvl 10 by now. have to be an assist to help mun mun and michelle when we three play. maple story. i gave up again. i was too devasted that someone deleted my lvl 30 character. i dont vene have the mood to play water margin. my mum almost cried yesterday cuz she jus repaired her car when it got bumped again. pity...NOT!!! as if i would want to pity her.

10:51 AM

Can I Turn Back Time?

Thursday, October 19, 2006

this day was worst than the last. my feet hurt like hell and walking up the stairs seem to be forever. the dancing? i cnat take it no more!!! its too painful for me to even bend down. and my knee is blue black. plus pn changs has so many comments bout taerobic that most of the time all i think she wants is face. its not as if like she's doing anything to help us. all she's doing is approving our practise time. thats all. i also can do la. plus i think cf needs more practise than the taekwondo girls do. besides this years school leavers service will be the WORST in the history of worst school leavers service. its totally absurb to scream at us when we do something wrong. its better when we have fun and practise at the same time. rather than suffering and forcing ourselves to practise. after the holidays is the rehearsal for curicular awards and then its the day of the curicular awards and after that will be school leavers service. and after that will be freedom for me!!! haih..i want to stay in class la..get all my result back. though i know its not gonna be good. no pian no gain

6:52 PM

Can I Turn Back Time?

Tuesday, October 17, 2006

call today a serries of unfortunate events. i over slept and got scolded in the morning. then i couldnt find my badges. then i couldnt find my taekwondo belt. then i went to school all moody as i usually do and found out i din bring all my exercise bbooks. i was so damn freaking pissed. then i saw my seni paper this mrning and wanted to cry out loud. but i still havent....i really want to...and i need to...then i spent the whole day doing school leavers service thank god man...i din bring any of my exercise books. but still had to go for science and here comes another i wanna cry scean...haih...my feet hurt lyk hell later. and stioll had to go for taerobic. i really no mood today. plus the stupid pn chang complain so much one single praise also din give. WTF is wrong with her. besides the fact taht she so called wants us to "dance" lyk the cheerleaders. translation according to me...she wants us to dance lyk bitches. haha..tough luck with that. sommore plan whole day practisa tomorro. someone kill me please!!!!!!! after that i walk back to school and saw ppl at de bb court....i wanna play......then was my music class. explain to me one thing. why does my life seem to fill my heart with sorrows. tomorrow grantee i will cry wan. i cannot tahan ade. she go and scold me for the whole lesson. WTF. i do this wron i do that wrong. WTF does she want!!!. haiyor.... then go in the car my mumscold me forkepping her waiting for 1 hour. scold scold scold. and now im wrintting my sorrows here.. i need a shoulder to cry on........

8:56 PM

Can I Turn Back Time?

Monday, October 16, 2006

betrayal and broken hearts come in one package. theres no telling what will it do to you. tears will flow. fear will appear in our eyes. i really have no idea how to explain what would happen. its all in experience actually. in my own words id cry a ocean and still i would be sad and un satisfied. my grandpa died on the day i wish something exciting would happen in my life. did i foretold his death?? did i cause his death by my wish for death on myself? i dont really wanna think bout this. his death cause millions of relatives and loved ones that he left behind shed tears.

3:05 PM

Can I Turn Back Time?

Sunday, October 15, 2006

how can i explain this when there are no words to do so. just one thing for todays poat. short and simple cuz nothing happend today tahts worth u guys knowing.... BE CAREFUL WHAT YOU WISH FOR

11:40 PM

Can I Turn Back Time?

Friday, October 13, 2006

todays just not my day!!!! thats one thing that i wanna make it clear. i hate boys!!!!!! dumb idiotic guys!!!!my mum's gonna band me from everything in my life is she sees me at the basket ball court filled with guys which are btw idiots. or if she sees me with a tomboy....sometimes i wish i wasnt alive. when people say in pretty they are lying. when people say im ugly they are too proud of themselves. if they say im smart they are lying. if they say im stupid they just too proud. if they say im pretty and smart it doesnt make me pretty smart it makes me feel lied to. if they say im ugly and stupid it doesnt make me feel any better than pretty smart it makes me feel lied to. how long are you gonna me waiting. how long are you gonna delay this. cuz i cannot wait no more.

4:28 PM

Can I Turn Back Time?

Thursday, October 12, 2006

when it comes to life ill describe it in three words " unfair " " pathetic " " useless ". how i pray that id die right now. my stomach hurts from basket ball. dunno whose knee kena me. but i dun blame them. i had so much fun today. most fun ive had in decades. i feel confuised sometimes. i drift away from a few of my frens and a simple game can get us all close again for just a moment. i lurve all my frens. they seem to be the only thing in my life that appreciates me and love me for who i am ( not lesbian...as a sis ). now my foot hurts plus my tummy.... >.<>
I LOVE BASKET BALL AND WELL......MY FRENS

4:52 PM

Can I Turn Back Time?

Wednesday, October 11, 2006

i really dont want to know what will happen today or tomorrow or after that.i finally finished my exams. what a relief. though im gonna fail like shit. who cares! theres a whole lot of things happening today. after school huei cwin me sarritha went to basket ball court wan to play wan but no basket ball. so the huei cwin and sarritha took de broom and helped dry the court. funny. i didnt bother.we spent like 2 whole hours trying to dry that dumb place. then to shorten the story sarritha triped off a root and fell on a bigger one and started laughing. end!! haha...no mood to write long today. short and simple thats my life. i hope.

5:02 PM

Can I Turn Back Time?

Tuesday, October 10, 2006

theres nothing in this world taht could make my life complete...one more day and im free from the torture from this horrible pointless examination...its a total waste of time...today's question...how could you love someone who doesnt love you...do you love me for who i am or what i pretend to be...kinda sucks to be me so i dont think anyone want to be right now...i really want to switch with someone...somehow i dont mind...i want to escape from this horrible nightmare...im not prefect and i know that...so why do you have to rub it in my face...

4:56 PM

Can I Turn Back Time?

Saturday, October 07, 2006

i finally figured out that youre all the same
always coming out with some kind of story
cuz take a look at me and youll see im for real
i cant help it if i space in a daze
my eyes turn out the other way
i may switch off and go in a day dream
in this head my thoughts are deep
sometimes i cant even speak
would someone be and and pretend im off again
in my world
i dont know when will ANYONE stop blaming and stop LYING to me. my mum blamed me for causing HER to knock someone's car while i DIDNT do ANYTHING. she said i "DISTRACTED" her. then it was a whole lot of scolding.im sorry if i begin to sound dramatic but its just really unfair. especially when i didnt do anything. thing became worst but i decided not to share the horror. those who know whats happening will understand. this saves them the imbaracement. since they were loud enough to LIE to me. especially about something like this. now i know why my mum wanted to check my phone. even if i was innocent no one would believe me. besides the fact that i cant thrust anyone anymore. theres nothing in this world that makes my life more broken than it already is.....

p.s. i typed this with my elbows...took sometime...but.. ok wat

6:51 PM

Can I Turn Back Time?

Friday, October 06, 2006

today was off to a bad start...lol...figures...first of all..bi and pj paper was so damn freaking easy!!!!monday got sejarah...>.< charanjeet(dunno how 2 spell tat freaking lady's name la) scolded me bout my hair...theres a fact that i learn...charan dont like people with my kind of hair...espcially when they dont pin up like me..^^hehe. i dont know why have to pin up. my hair's not bothering me or i my face or something. its just at de side...is that a crime...i din get offence also...plus its not a very big deal if charan kick me ut of st mary...ill GLADLY go....damn i feel like killing my mum...just bcuz im close and friends with someone who looks like a tb she has to jump to conclusion..so what if im frens with tb...im not gonna lke turn into them...you dont wan me to know or get close to any guy...just to protect me??!! you dont want me to go out often..just to protect me??!! being your crappy self i dont even listen. i know boys and its none of your buisness. i get heartbroken by them its none of your buisness.i kinda wish you'd stop bugging me.....oh yea...and my sis is still a dumb brat....^^

4:26 PM

Can I Turn Back Time?

Thursday, October 05, 2006

finally. ive done my projects. now only left the sivic one. who cares. im just glad im done with the kgt project. woohoo!!! too bad i got so mad. i lost all my downloads and had to do them all over again. my dumb sis got some virus in it again. i have to download water margin and maple and flyff. im so so so gonna kill her. should put one in her profile and get all her stuff deleted. damn!

6:20 PM

Can I Turn Back Time?

Tuesday, October 03, 2006

life is now even more unbearable . exams draw near and i dont even bother to study . im jus glad i finish my KGT . so damn confuising . now no choice cause have to pass up tomorrow so simply do la . as long as i pass up and get some marks . i dont understand why we have to do all these crap . i mean...its no use to us . we wont be doing in still in de next 30 years . so why force us to do things when its not important . furthermore it screws up our mind and effect our studies . who ever that started this dumb thing must go to hell . cause that fella is practically not thinking bout anyone but his own comfort . all the teachers just give and mark give and mark . while we have to do all the thinking and typing and searching . when we could be enjoying our school life rather feeling misarable over a few silly and useless projects that pile up . the ministry of education must be blur to not know this . somemore add extra subjects.

1:52 PM

Can I Turn Back Time?

Sunday, October 01, 2006

today!!! is another living proof that guys a idiots..or..im jus retarded....somethings definately wrong with me....i cant find a single guy that i can thrust after what happend...either that or the guy's just too idiotic and desparate... ok ok ok...enough bout this crap!!! today was just boring at tuition...except for the fact that stilll remains...emily lurve irritating me...i somehow get real irritated but dont show it....shes unbearable....>< wats wrong with looking around class?! i mean its boring and im trying to entertain myself... it's impossible to understand what's going on through a guy's heart u told me that u wanted me and now that i've given u everything, u tell me ur leaving u told me it was the first time you felt this way, and said that i was special ii believed you and it was my happiness *you should have told me your feelings have faded *i had no idea, and i continued to depend on u *although i say i hate you now, ill be missing u *because im a girl , to whom love is everything ^they say when u give a guy all he wants he quickly gets bored ^and now i know that's the thruth ^although i tell myself, i'll never be tricked by love again ^i fall in love, and my heart is broken again repeat* repeat ^ please dont break the hearts of girls, who would do anything for love i didnt know that living this life while being loved would be so hard although i say i hate you now, i'll be missing u because im a girl, to whom love is everything

7:24 PM

Can I Turn Back Time?